Ridiculous Thoughts

I wish I knew how to make music, so that I'll be able to make a solid depressing tune...

I wish I knew how to dance, so that I'll be able to dance for the tune till my feet bled...

I wish I knew how to paint, so that I can use the blood on the floor to paint a portrait of myself smiling, when I was three...

I wish I had access to an acid trip, so that I can leave myself and bring the three year old boy back to life...

I wish I had the power to go back time...

To stop myself from seeing what I've seen...

To stop myself from going through all the lessons I've been through...

To stop myself from forgetting how to hope, to believe and to have faith...

To tell myself that the grass was not even green in the first place...

Because all that I want is what I had before... I never wanted nor needed more...

Its funny...

How I can relate to so many people who are millions of miles away, but not even a single soul around me...

How an abstract element can have more emotions than human beings...

How I can still make people believe that what they're looking at is what they are seeing...

I know that I am slowly losing my sight... but heck, what is there to be seen anyway?

In all,

I set myself free only to realize that everyone else are still trapped. . .

Fuck it, I'm done pretending...